A really long while. I have had so many thoughts that made my mind spin. I don’t expect much from those around me but I have learnt to detach.
From unnecessary people.
From emotions that bring me no joy.
From encounters that serve me no purpose.
I find myself free, liberated but most of all, happy. Alone but not lonely. Some people like to surround themselves with others as if to validate their existence. The whole exercise of socializing and being “on” is too much. Too fake. Too exhausting.
There’s no such a place as a safe space, the only one is within ourselves. The cynic in me has always been wary and cautious of others. People will know what they need to know about me and not what they think they want to know. I let my guard down once because I thought it was “safe” and the environment that was I supposedly in was “sacred”, only to be proven that my initial gut feeling was right. I am my only protector.
As I get closer to another journey around the sun. I find myself surrounded by deep thoughts and questions. I wonder about the past few years where the days seem to have rolled into each other, the lack of permanence for people, of people and places.
Years ago I read an article where it said that the people you have at your wedding, you will unlikely be friends with in five years. Funny how true that rang. Especially after Covid. The virus that cleared out the path for many things. That created orphans, removed unwanted ties and forced a new reality of a stark new world where a lot of the bullshit and stupidity is revealing themselves.
Friendships that one thought would last a long time somehow depleted. The messages have been sparse and one sided. Perhaps this is my lesson on detachment.
Thank you for that lesson. I’ve learnt to love, let go and when and if it comes back, it will probably be another lesson.
Wasabi's awakening 